Call it nycdodgy.

So I spent last weekend in New York City and this is one of the asshats I came across.

Of course I gave him the loose change I had. How could I not. He’s an honest fuck.

Overheard from the cute, ginger-haired, long-legged flight attendant on the plane from Chicago:

“I love your mascara.”

“I love your sweater skirt.”

“My mom was asking me about Facebook. I said, ‘ma, don’t go on Facebook. You can barely work a smartphone.’ ”

She also talked about wanting more hours and explained to some douche passenger the rules of electrical device shut-off.

“There was a study….plus we want your full attention.”

Well, she had mine. I even took my headphones off to give her a good listen.

Overheard outside the Patriot on Chambers Street:

“Fuck it. I’ll take a two-hour lunch.”

There are a lot of cute Asian gals in NYC and they’re all wearing the same brown eyeglass frames.

On the way from JKF to the hotel, I was sandwiched in the back seat between a couple of Russian/Ukrainian/or something-like-that girls. It was like being in the van from season two of The Wire when those prostitutes were being driven around.

Where did I get my drink on? Well, Bubby’s in Tribeca, of course. It was featured in one of my recent favorite pics Newlyweds – directed by Tribeca’s own Ed Burns.

Sat right there and had two pints of the black stuff during happy hour. (

Women in Tribeca are truly stunning.

If you’re walking around Times Square and have to pee it’s actually difficult to find someplace to do so.

Another place I enjoyed a few jars of Guinness and Yuengling at was Feile’s Irish Pub on 33rd.

At 5 o’clock in the morning, around Penn Station, were a lot of Snooki-ish chicks in short tight skirts, wandering around like a herd of zombies.

At one point on 7th Avenue an anti-white rally broke out.

Whitey sucks

I  had to do this on the downlow, ’cause I’m a whitey and you can see the evil eyes staring me down. The Irish fuck that I am.

Nothing happened…there was no violence or anything. Just some speaker screaming about the white man and quoting from what I think was the Bible. He was surrounded by dudes wearing some sort of ankle-length sweatery uniform things.

So not to end on that note, here’s something that’s on the memorial wall near the WTC site.