I found this Depeche Mode 1986 Black Celebration concert T-shirt at a Chicago thrift store. It’s the same one Shailene Woodley wore in White Bird in a Blizzard. 

It’s a little tight, even on my slender frame, but I still wore it to Mia Lucy’s party in Ukranian Village. Celice was there. I met her a few years ago when I dabbled in theater. I remember during play rehearsal one night – Celice won my heart when she wore a bandanna as a shirt.

We dated briefly. Celice was a better dancer than an actress, and she had the legs to prove it. She was the only girl who ever let me shave her legs, although it wasn’t my idea, she wanted me to.

“Hello Celice, it’s good to see you at Mia Lucy’s party,” I said.

She shrugged and said hi to my friend Aidan. I don’t think Celice ever saw Aidan’s penis, but she called him Cookie Dick.

I walked with Aidan to the kitchen where Chicago recluse author Clive Javanski was hanging out with some other assholes and two beautiful women. Clive took in instant like to my shirt and compared it to his very tight-fitting Smiths “Hatful of Hollow” tee that he sometimes wore. Bullshit, I told him, mine was better. He agreed. He signaled for me and Cookie Dick to step outside for a hit of something illegal, I assume, when I heard two words – words I’ve heard countless times but never so beautiful sounding.

“Hi Liffey.”

It was one of the two kitchen girls. Actually it was Keira, who I didn’t recognize. Keira was Celice’s sister, younger by a few years. She wore cute summer dress (better legs than Celice) and a Christian rock tee, even though she wasn’t Christian.

“Shailene Woodley – in that movie,” she said. “I loved that dance scene with her and her boyfriend.”

Keira was talking about the scene at a club where they danced to a remix of Depeche Mode’s “Behind The Wheel.”

She found the song on her phone and we hooked it up to Mia Lucy’s sound system. We turned it up and danced. If you’ve seen the movie, it was just like that.

Other people joined in. Mia Lucy was dancing with Aidan, Celice with Clive. I couldn’t tell you if they kissed at the end of the song, but Keira and I did. I don’t know if Celice saw us, nor did I care. I kissed her sister.

I think it was a fantasy of mine I didn’t know I had.