I have zero sympathy for anyone hurt while participating in the Spanish Running of the Bulls festival in Pamplona.

None. Absolutely none. I don’t know if these people sign a waiver before they participate, but it probably begins: I ________ am an asshole. OK?

Take this muck.

Running with the Bulls in Pamplona

No sympathy for you.

And this girl. She’s getting quite the grab ass. No sympathy for you. None.

Girl in running with the bulls

Quite the grab ass.

Girl running of the bulls

She’s kinda cute too.

Running with the Bulls

Then there’s this muck. Looks like he’s in the middle of a sex act with the beast. “This ain’t what they promised me when I came to Spain.”

I wonder if any other assholes had their pants removed by a bull. What kind of kinky sex is this clown into anyway?

Running with the Bulls blog

And you want to be my latex salesman.

Think of the stress these animals must go through with this. I’m gonna add this to “Things I’d Never Do.”

  • Skydive
  • Parasail
  • Hot Air Ballooning
  • Be a White Girl at Holi
  • Running of the Bulls

They have something like this in Northwest Indiana, by the way. It’s called “Running of the Fireworks.” You run down a street and get fireworks thrown at your head from all directions. Because Hoosiers like to blow shit up. I’ve had Hoosier fireworks land on my flat in Chicago.

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