I’m getting sick of Morrissey, who’s been in the news lately for canceling an appearance on Jimmy Kimmel Live because the Duck Dynasty stars were on the same episode and the vegetarian’s concert at L.A.’s Staple Center will not allow meat products to be sold. Who eats meat at a concert anyway? Shame on Moz for not having the balls to do Kimmel’s show, which really didn’t require balls to do anyway. The Duck Dynasty cast, who probably never heard of Morrissey, certainly didn’t give a shit a veggie was on the show. They win (and boy did they – the ratings for their A&E show skyrocketed after the singing animal rights activist quit the show). Who eats meat at a concert anyway? Way to think of your fans, Morrissey,…
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I was certain the In Memoriam segment of Sunday’s Academy Awards broadcast would include Anne Hathaway’s hair. If you were watching Charlize Theron dance on stage, from a distance on a non high-definition TV, you might have thought – just for a moment – that it was Dame Judi Dench. I’ll call her Charlie until the hair comes back. I didn’t see Michelle Williams or Carey Mulligan at the Oscars, but I’m sure them and their pixie cuts were close by. What’s with all these pixie cuts on actresses and on women in general? I realize a lot of it has to do with a film role, like Anne’s in Les Miserables. But Jesus, has anyone’s hair taken so long to grow? Her locks…
Redeye, which I took to calling him (not to his face), didn’t follow up on his threat. Thus, I lived to endure the few months of first semester lunch. Redeye and his band of Lager louts accepted me, as if that was a compliment. You see, if there was one talent that got me through high school, it was that I got along with everybody – jocks, geeks, gays, stoners, princesses, and detention room criminals. As far as my new lunch room compatriots, yes they were thugs, but lazy thugs. Maybe it was the early lunch hour. Nobody had energy. A sad excuse for a food fight ended as soon as it started. “I’m just too tired” one of Redeye’s gang said. The only time…
The Dodgy 