Essays, Interviews, Observations, Pop Culture, Stories, and other Dodginess

Goodbye Marilyn, Hello…Mother of Dragons?

Posted on April 30, 2012

That statue of Marilyn Monroe on Chicago’s Michigan Avenue will be gone next week.

From the Trib article: “The arrival of Forever Marilyn caused a stir among local critics, with some arguing that groups of  onlookers taking pictures with her exposed legs was a throwback to sexist times.”

Oh my! Pictures with exposed legs! Is that not normal? I do that with the waitresses at Tilted Kilt every time I’m there.

Anyway. Like some others, I thought it was odd to have her statue there in the first place. Didn’t get the Chicago connection.

So I’ve come up with some replacement statues to stand in her soon-to-be former spot in Pioneer Square. Some have Chicago ties, some don’t (hey if they can do it with Marilyn, so can I, with others).

Fiona (Emmy Rossum), of Shameless.

Emmy Rossum as Fiona in Showtime's Shameless

Fiona, the feisty Chicago Irish gal taking care of the Gallagher clan on the city’s near west side. This Emmy deserves an Emmy, if not the statue.

The Cast of The League

The League on FX

It’s a kick-arse show and it takes place in Chicago. Shame on you if you haven’t seen it yet.

Al Bundy from Married with Children. Also set in Chicago. Or maybe you can have Kelly Bundy, wearing the Marilyn dress.

Brit Marling

Actress Brit Marling

Nothing to do with Chicago. But I adore this talented actress/writer and it’s an excuse to post her pic again.

Al Capone. Ok, this would never fly in a city trying to forget this kinda history. But you have to admit, it would draw tons of tourists. As long as his legs aren’t exposed.

Candyman. Even more dastardly than Mr. Capone. He ruled the Cabrini Green housing project with a hook for a hand.

Candyman

Jenny McCarthy. Cute actress (and famous mom now) from Chicago’s south side.

Daenerys “Dany” Targaryen. Her grace,  the Mother of Dragons from Game of Thrones.

Dany in Game of Thrones on HBO

Probably would be the most popular of them all. Throw her dragons in there too, for good measure.

And finally, Ferris Bueller. Obvious choice. Or the gang from The Breakfast Club.

WXRT Loves the China Girl

Posted on April 28, 2012

Chicago’s WXRT is taunting me.

I’ve poked fun at them in the past about their playlist, using “Devil Inside” by INXS as an example of laziness and an ignorance of eclectic. Then last week during a few dial turns to 93.1 FM I came across “Devil” yet again. Twice. They’re in need of a song monitor…a song czar…to stop the insanity. Does anyone at the studio ever say, “shit, we’re playing this again?”

Here’s proof of their ignorance.

They’re celebrating their 40th anniversary this year. This weekend is the 80s flashback. Looking at their extended play list, at 11:30 p.m. Friday night they played David Bowie’s hit “China Girl.”

There are a lot of great songs from the 80s, right? And plenty from Mr. Bowie. So what gets played Saturday, just over 12 hours later, at about 1:30 p.m.?

“China Girl” by David Bowie.

Think of all the songs from a decade of music. Yet that’s two China Girls in a 14 hour period. Feck off ‘XRT, there’s no excuse for that! Someone should be fired. I’d force them to listen to this song continuously while locked in a closet for 72 hours but I think they’d enjoy that.

For one thing, “China Girl” is a song, much like “Devil Inside,” that’s pretty much in the station’s regular rotation. So playing it again during 80s weekend is nothing special.

Sometime I scratch my pants wondering what’s going on there. Is it that they’re getting old? In need of fresh blood?

Here’s a sample of 80s songs they played over a short period of time this Saturday afternoon.

Bad (overplayed, songs in their regular rotation anyway, etc.)

“China Girl” – David Bowie

“In Your Eyes” – Peter Gabriel (really??)

“Dancing with Myself” – Billy Idol

“The Finer Things” – Steve Winwood

“She Blinded Me with Science” – Thomas Dolby

“Mystify” – INXS (almost like “Devil” but not quite. Better than playing “Suicide Blonde” again, however).

GOOD (Ok, these are more like it for a “cool” 80s weekend)

“Home of the Brave” – The Nails

“Make a Circuit with Me” – The Polecats

“What do All the People Know” – The Monroes

“Pictures of Matchstick Men” – Camper Van Beethoven

“I Want Your (Hands on Me)” – Sinead O’Connor (A close one. They also played “Mandika.” A better choice would have been “Jerusalem” – one of the best songs of the 80s, period).

So far I have not heard, nor seen I believe, a decent Depeche Mode song. And this is the decade that brought us “Black Celebration.”

I assume they’re having a 90s a weekend. I’ll be more interested in that. Lots of great songs to choose from. Will they?

WXRT loves the China Girl

Sometimes I get violently ill when discussing 80s music (and fashion). So I must end with a clip of a fairly new song by the Scottish band The Imagineers, “The Imagineer.” Craig Ferguson has been using it to promote his upcoming shows in Scotland (there’s a great video for that promo).

Ms. 45 and Mugs Bunny

Posted on April 24, 2012

When I was watching Chicago recluse author Clive Javanski’s apartment the other weekend I came across a gem of an underground film in his collection.

Ms. 45.

A mute girl goes on a spree kill after sadly being assaulted twice in one New York day.

This film is full of win. I’m not gonna go all Wikipedia on it, but it has some bizarre moments I’m cool to recall.

Her gun jams when she tries to shoot “depressed bar guy,” but it misfires. DBG then takes the gun from her and shoots himself in the head.

There’s the scene where she knocks off what looks like reject holdovers from The Warriors.

The climatic ending at a Halloween party features a cast of dancing characters including a fat dracula and none other then Mr. Met, who gets ample screen time.

A co-star in Ms. 45.

Thana, who’s dressed as a nun, ends up shooting half the  males at this party but I believe Mr. Met survived.

This is an interesting film by Abel Ferrara. For awhile I thought the closest thing to a remake was The Brave One with Jodie Foster until I saw Thana attempt to shoot some teen dude just because he kissed his girlfriend goodbye.

Clive says he’s written an essay or short novel nobody’s seen yet that’s kinda an homage to this film. I also heard a rumor there was to be a remake with Milla Jovovich.

Zoe Lund is Thana or “Ms. 45”

Girl with a gun

The lead character in this is an attractive mute girl. It made me recall a favorite yet little-know thriller from the 90s, Mute Witness. A mute film make-up artist witnesses a crime on a movie set in Moscow and is soon sought after. I highly recommend.

Mute Witness

Now for the random Chicagoland photo of the night. If they were going to remake Ms. 45 in Chicago I’d want them to shoot a scene in or around this dive bar on the far south side (Hegewisch).

Mugs Bunny

Mugs Bunny. I like the sign, the name.