Essays, Interviews, Observations, Pop Culture, Stories, and other Dodginess

You’re not that cool, WXRT

Posted on November 2, 2011

You don’t realize how lame Chicagoland radio is until you travel around the country. It’s really pathetic that this major city has such crappy radio. To say WXRT is the best in the city is like saying it’s the cleanest toilet at a Speedway gas station.

Out of touch? Tired, old? It’s like they don’t know what’s cool to play anymore. Here’s an example:

More than likely, when you hear an INXS song on ‘xrt it’s going to be the tired “Devil Inside” or “Suicide Blonde.”  How about digging a little deeper into the catalogue with “Original Sin” or “Kiss the Dirt” ???

And I really believe I hear the same Pink Floyd/Led Zeppelin songs over and over.

‘xrt ain’t much more than a slightly hipper top 40/classic rock station.

Take a glance at their extended playlists and you’ll see what I mean. Or just listen for a while. Sure they throw in a gem or two but really, it’s rare.

I think they play Cracker’s “Low” at least every other day. If it’s Depeche Mode it’s most likely “Personal Jesus” or “Policy of Truth.”

One of the finest songs in the past few years is Liam Finn’s “Second Chance.” If ‘xrt ever played it, it was on New Music Thursday or New Noise at Nine (the two best listening periods for the station). But nah, they’ll spin “You’re All I Got Tonight” by The Cars for the zillionth time.

What ‘xrt should be is Radio Free Santa Fe. I caught this station while driving through New Mexico and now listen to it stream online on a regular basis.

Just the other day I heard them play Leonard Cohen’s “Everybody Knows” and Depeche Mode’s “Walking in My Shoes.”

Isn’t it unfair that the ears of Chicagoans aren’t treated to such music delight?

And what the feck is this?? On St. Pats, they’re big listening party featured the music by the great Irish artist Matisyahu.

Are you kidding me?? And the year before that I believe it was a Blues band.

Thank feck there’s Internet radio and Sirius and such. ‘xrt, you’re tired. Get some sleep and WAKE UP.

Update: A few hours ago I heard Terri Hemmert call the Red Hot Chili Peppers’ song she just played “Adventures of Rain Dance Molly.” It’s Maggie. MAGGIE!

Region Rats, Regionnaires, Hoosiers or Asshats?

Posted on October 18, 2011

Lots of riff around the region about what to call it’s  fine citizens. You mostly hear it in the media, and maybe some wank dive bar in Hammond. “Region Rats” is the most popular moniker.

I won’t get into the history of that. You can look it up. It supposedly has good connotations, but a rat is a rat. I think Region Rats I think smelly, puss-faced politicians. Or “The Departed” comes to mind, when Jackie-boy tells Leon he “smells a rat.”

"I smell a region rat"

 

Now apparently some wank wants to oust Region Rat and replace it with Regionnaire. Yea, I’m not the first to say it sounds like a serious affliction. Meh on that.

“Hoosiers” I suppose, is too state wide. This is a suburb of Chicago, Northwest Indiana is. Or it’s own small little state. Since no one  in Chicago or the rest of Indiana will have you us.

You see it’s easy in Dublin. I find “Dubliners” quite swell. There’s a few others not worth going into.

Really, who gives a shite what the Indianars are called in this corner of the state. I have different names for a variety of folks around here. Some have popped up in this blog, or will I’m sure.

"Welcome to Northwest Indiana"

 

 

Haunted house ‘butcher’ reports being groped by visitor – Post-Tribune

Posted on October 12, 2011

Haunted house ‘butcher’ reports being groped by visitor – Post-Tribune.

Uh-oh. It’s Haunted House time, which means groping season is on.

In this story, a 14-year-old boy acting in this Porter Haunted House had some strange man (with a purse!) run his  hand down his chest before clutching his crotch.

And check out what the attraction’s (I’ll say there was an attraction!) owner said about it: ‘accidental contact between spectators and workers is an unfortunate part of the nature of the business.’

Yikes! Does what happened sound accidental? Hmmm….who do you think does more groping? The visitors to these haunted houses or the ‘actors’ ??? I went on a date once to a haunted house and she groped the shanks out of me in there. I guess that’s different.

By the way, the article got it wrong. It’s Amhurst Asylum, not Amburst.